Writing My Heart Out Without Seeing What I'm typing...Just A Black Screen and Words That Should Not Have Been Said

There are so many instances that I said or wrote something and regretted it later. The moments that stand out in my mind that I have said or written something I wish I hadn't are all due to me trusting people with personal information or feelings when I should have known better and just kept them to myself. People like to pretend though, having false pretenses about their intentions and friendships. You would think that someone you have known since you were six years old was someone that you could trust, but no. They didn't care about me or my feelings they just wanted to something good to talk about and use me like a gossip story like they did with everyone else they knew. So I regret telling them anything, and that's a lot. It's not like I said something mean to someone by accident or wish my Mom didn't overhear something I said. I wish that I can take back the truth I unleashed to those I saw as friends and I wish that I hadn't just let them know these things without being the slightest bit reluctant. But as much as I regret saying those things and sharing words that should have just been kept private, I can't help but think that I did myself a favor. How else would I have learned that certain people were not to be trusted? I would be stuck in the same rut that I was one year ago and so, although a part of me regrets those words, a part of me is thankful to myself for taking a situation that is quite unfortunate and seeing the positive influence it has had and will have on my life. So I went through some rough things like loosing close friends and finding out that they were not really being a friend. I think that it was worth my regret to be able to move forward to better things and people in my life.